5 ways to handle your toddler’s temper tantrums
Tbh I don't think I have fully mastered the technique of handling temper tantrums.My sister used to warn me about the terrible twos but I never fully understood it.I just thought yeah Vimbai you exaggerate,I mean how bad can it be, well it can be really bad, now I know better. ...love u sis.
Kai turned 2 recently and it's a battle of meltdowns, over excitement and sleep.It's even a harder adjustment for him as we welcomed his little brother three weeks ago.He has a lot going on.It's kinda hard balancing these three, yes, my hubby included.But here is how I try to handle the terrible 2s as they say.
What are temper tantrums?
Temper tantrums are when your toddler cries, gets angry, kicks, flails about when they are trying to deal with their emotions.In a way we can say its a way of dealing with the frustration of not getting their point across.
Why are they worse when they are 2?
Claire B. Kopp, professor of applied developmental psychology at California's Claremont Graduate University, attributes much of the problem to uneven language skills. "Toddlers are beginning to understand a lot more of the words they hear, yet their ability to produce language is so limited," she says. When your child can't express how she feels or what she wants, frustration mounts.
How do you handle these?
To be honest you can not stop these meltdowns.Your toddler is being initiated to what life is all about.He is being taught how to handle the ups and downs in life and you, my dear, is being taught to be patient.Yes, being a parent’s biggest lesson is Patience, it's the gift that keeps on giving.Its PATIENCE 101 to PATIENCE 501, runs till they are adults.
So when my toddler starts throwing a fit because I told him no more pizza, or stop making noise your brother is sleeping.I simply let him be.I make sure he doesn't hurt himself whilst he is flailing across the floor and kicking madly.I on the other hand go to a happy place in my mind and let him be .I tell him Kai when you are finished acting up tell me so we can work this out.
Before I would try to talk to him whilst he was throwing a fit this only made it worse as it reinforced his behaviour.But letting him be has proved to work a little,he calms down more faster than holding him and trying to talk to him.But if this happens in a public place then maybe it is better to simply carry your toddler to a quiet place where he can deal with everything in a closed setting.(no/less judgy faces)
Secondly keep your calm.Do not get angry or start shouting.He or she will get only more upset.I know it's easier said than done.My husband when he wants to get to me(rolls eyes) he says be more patient with him, he doesn't know anything, you should apologise for making him upset. Something I said to him when he got angry once.Yes as I said it is easier said than done but mami it is very possible.Just breathe.
Thirdly try to figure out the triggers and avoid those.For example my son goes ham when he is hungry whoever said a hungry man is an angry man was not lying.He eats every three hours so if i miss this by an hour I am in for it.
Fourthly spend some quality time with your toddler.The joy they have when you take them out for a walk or when you join them lying on the rug and play with them it's everything.I know sometimes we get too caught up in our busy hectic lives but being there for your children reinforces that you got their back when all else fails they can rely on u.
Lastly try to find a middle ground after the melt down.Try talking to him and let him know how much you love him but also make sure he understands bad behaviour is a no-no.
And remember you are the parent/grown-up so be strong an pull through.
